I need a change, and I haven't even started my career yet.

I hate my internship. I hate what I'm doing, I hate the other interns I work with. The only good thing about that place is the free gym.

I've literally been doing nothing for the past 3 weeks. I finally learned the system I'm suppose to be working on, on Friday. The project the other interns and I are working on... they're so far ahead of me as far as progress and then they think I'm not doing anything (which I'm not.. not working on the project). My mentor who is suppose to be helping me with the project hasn't met with me specifically on the work, because she's really busy. AND she's pregnant, so she's been trying to get things wrapped up on her end before she leaves in the beginning of August.

The one girl intern flipped in the hall on me today, because I missed a meeting on Friday because I was in a 4 hour one before that which ran over. That my mentor AND manager were in, and my mentor was suppose to come to the 2nd one too. When I came time for the other one, BOTH of them asked where it was and what we were discussing. I told them, and they both said that they felt it was better if I stayed in the 1st meeting.
I told this bitch intern this and she was just like "well you missed it and I'm not answering your questions since you decide to not show up". SHUT THE HELL UP.

I've been asking people what I'm suppose to be doing and what I'm suppose to be looking at, and no one has helped me.

I'm so sick of it. I don't like doing what I'm doing - application development. They have me coding, and I don't feel comfortable coding. I don't like coding. I hate writing document specifications. I don't know what I want to do with computers anymore. I don't know how to do security, which is what my Masters will be in (I know I'll learn) but what if I get into that and don't like it? I'm sort of getting sick of computers. But then again I don't really want to do anything else. Marketing is fun and good, but I don't think I'm good with it. Good enough to get a decent job.

And then that stresses me out, because I have around $65,000 in student loans, and I need a good job to pay them back with. I almost wish I could just become a blogger or a communications person for a tech company, so I can just tell people about our products instead of actually working on them. But then again, working on those products is what makes all the money.

And then my whole family is counting on me and is proud of me for working and getting internships and making money and stuff, but I feel like I'm letting them down because I don't actually know as much as they think I do.


Maybe I just need some inspiration, or some vode of confidence that I am doing the right thing and majoring in the right area.
I don't want to go back to work tomorrow, or really ever. I sit for 8 hours doing barely anything and I'm always so tired and I never want to do anything but sleep. :/